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Have you ever been hurt so bad that it turned your whole world upside down and you almost couldn’t remember who or what you were? When my friend Andrea got out of a terrible relationship, she became a totally different person and I don’t mean that in a good way.
She gained 15lbs, had pimples and breakouts on her face and became very sickly. In effect, Andrea also lost her confidence and felt that no man would ever be interested in her again. Aside from that, she almost got fired from her job because she couldn’t seem to concentrate was always missing her deadlines.
To help clear out her mind from all the stress, I urged her to file a 2-week vacation leave and go with me to my hometown where she could get some fresh air and wouldn’t have to worry about anything like food, rent, or transportation. I made sure that all she had to do was relax and enjoy her stay.
One night, the moment I was been waiting for finally happened. She asked me for some advice on what I think she should do to feel good and be happy again. I was glad that she came to realize that she needed to do something with herself.
Our conversation lasted until dawn but it was all worth it because when we went back to the city from our vacation, she was back to her senses and was ready to start a new way of life.
Here are some of the things that I told her that night.
Take a break from the world – from reality, from your illusions and even from the digital world.
When things get overwhelming, the first thing that you should always do is pause, breathe and give yourself a break. Taking a short vacation doesn’t mean you’re running away or escaping from the problem. It’s just a strategy to make yourself stronger and give yourself the space and time you need to clear your mind, broaden your perspective and come up with a better plan or decision.
Also, you don’t really have to overdo it by going to the ends of the earth or climb Mount Kilimanjaro. You can just play tourist in your own city by creating you own local bucket list.
Aside from having the opportunity to start where you live, having a local bucket list also encourages you to stop making excuses and be more appreciative of the beauty around you.
Achieving positive change requires incredible self-discipline, which simply means doing what needs to be done even if you don’t really feel the need to do it.
People never run out of reasons NOT to do something that they’re SUPPOSSED to do. They will always find ways to justify why they can’t do something or convince themselves that their goals are impossible. Little do they know that living that kind of life has serious and lasting consequences.
Excuses hold you back from recognizing opportunities and from expanding your horizons. So, you better start cutting the crap out, eliminate those excuses and stick with your plans to get things done.
For instance, if you’re serious about attaining financial freedom and getting better at managing your hard-earned money, then find ways to make things happen. You can probably start by knowing your credit score and improving it.
And it’s not just about paying your debts, girl. It’s also about making your credit payments on time.
In order to create progress, you need to give yourself a time to heal.
Don’t settle for a quick fix or a temporary solution. Instead, think long-term and eliminate big issues for good.
Healing starts when you decide to look at the brighter side of life rather than dwelling on your problems. So, learn to forgive yourself, be thankful for the pain and be patient in your journey.
And speaking of healing, I was lucky to have come across this very interesting article about getting rid of stubborn post-baby bellies.
If you’re two years post-partum or more, still looking like as if you’re four months pregnant and feeling bloated all the time, then you might be suffering from abdominal muscles separation called Diastasis Recti Abdominis (DRA). But don’t worry, writer Jessie Mundell provides specific exercises to heal and put those muscles back in place.
Another way to heal is by having a spiritual perspective.
Activate your spiritual immune system by surrendering thoughts that are not of love.
It simply means you have to learn to let go of hatred and resentment in your heart.
To guide you into the radicalism of forgiveness and love and help you transcend your pain, check this out – “Changing Our Mental Filters.”
Ladies, I hope that you can apply these efforts to get your life straightened out. Just remember that once you decide to embark on the journey, you should be ready to do what it takes and you should be willing to get out of your comfort zone and keep on pushing forward to be better.
I love these tips. Taking a break from reality and really working on yourself is a great idea. Everyone needs to clear your head from time to time. I try not to offer much advice though to people.
Excuses will be the death of every good intention. Make a plan, stick with the plan – make no excuses! It’s really the only way to be successful in life. I’ve been doing this for years now.
Local tour is actually a good idea! I often interpret ‘fresh air’ as a completely new place, but that’s often not possible to do and I get even more depressed. There’s always an unexplored part of a place, so it can be a good, cheap trip once in a while. Thanks for the tip!
I also find doing my routines helps to clear my mind. It feels great to have something that keeps on going when everything else in life seems to crumble, and it calms my heart somehow. It’s strange because normally I hate those routines so much, and I never run out of excuses not to do them indeed!
Being ready to change and saying you’re ready are different things. I changed my life around about two years ago. I am constantly stepping (leaping) out of my comfort zone.
Healing starts the moment we accept our mistakes and weakness. I think it’s a very important step because blaming others and denying ourselves are harmful behaviors. Rushing won’t do any good, so we should find it with our own pace.
I haven’t started making changes in my life as long ago as you have; in fact, I only started around 2 months ago. However, I can already feel how stepping out of my comfort zone is affecting almost every aspect of my life in a really great way. It’s the best decision I have ever made.
I suffer from Diastasis Recti Abdominis (DRA), and my physical therapist has recommended a lot of the exercises that author Jesse Mundell recommended in the article referenced above. I can tell you that they really do help if you have DRA. I have noticed a great improvement both in the physical appearance of my tummy, but also in how strong my core feels.