Make the Most Out Of Life By Spreading Your Wings & Embracing Change As a Way to Help You Grow – Grand Ascent Online Women's Magazine | Success Secrets for Women
Grand Ascent Online Women's Magazine | Success Secrets for Women

Make the Most Out Of Life By Spreading Your Wings & Embracing Change As a Way to Help You Grow

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By Vanessa Green

Last weekend while I was shopping for clothes, I bumped into someone I never thought I would see in person again – my college roommate!

Sharing a room with Kerry for 4 years was one of the best things that ever happened to me during college. We were so close that whenever we were short on funds, we would combine our money and share a meal together.

I remember her being so weird at the time. Her morning would always start the same way every single day; fix the bed, get a shower, eat her breakfast and leave. I always thought she had a mild case of OCD because whenever something happened and her daily routine didn’t go exactly according to plan (like something silly such as the line for the bathroom was too long) she would get easily annoyed and troubled.

Since we had some catching up to do, we decided to eat lunch together at a nearby restaurant.

I found out that she has a very demanding job as a senior manager in an engineering company. She’s always traveling to places and sometimes lives outside the country for a couple of months.

For someone who used to have a hard time dealing with minor situations, I wondered how she manages to adjust when she encounters certain changes in her line of work.

She told me that it was never easy for her. But her personal experiences made her realize that life has its own unique way of doing things and she couldn’t possibly have her way all the time.

Life doesn’t always go according to plan.

No matter how hard we try to strategize and create carefully laid out plans, there will always be surprises along the way. Unexpected things make it difficult, if not impossible for us to get back on track. When we lose control, we get stressed, desperate and worse, we let ourselves get stuck in disappointment.

Ladies, major life transitions are not easy, but they offer us wonderful opportunities for growth.

Change can be very overwhelming because of its uncertainty and discomfort. However, once we embrace it, we become stronger and better women.

In “4 Ways to Find Yourself in a New City,” writer Julia Dellitt reminds us about the importance of patience and willingness to change in dealing with this type of transition.

Sometimes, we need to surrender ourselves completely until it becomes a part of who we are.

It may be hard to swallow but “testing your limits, expanding your horizons and seeking fresh experiences” are the only way to grow.

Kerry and I didn’t really notice the time. We still had a lot of things to talk about so we decided to transfer to a place that serves great dessert.

I learned that Kerry just got married last year. I am still single so I can get really curious about it. So I asked her a generic question: “How’s married life?”

Contrary to what many people believe, the first year of marriage is not really the “honeymoon phase.”

I was expecting an exciting answer like she couldn’t get enough of him or there is always birds singing everywhere – something to that effect. But to my surprise, she was very honest and direct with her reply.

She said it was real tough and very far from “happily ever after.” They have a lot of arguments, mostly about simple stuff like what TV series to watch, what to cook for dinner, when to do grocery shopping or who’s going to clean what.

“One Year Itch: 25 Tips to Avoid Marriage Problem Early On” by Julie Keating can be very useful for newlyweds or even for couples who are finding ways to make their marriage work. This set of preventive measures will help you survive your first two years of marriage, when most adjustments and change take place.

Don’t wait too long to get started!

Hit the ground running and keep your momentum because once you lose it, it will be more difficult for you to break out.

In “My Journey to Sobriety Wasn’t Easy, But It Was Worth It,” recovering alcoholic Brittney Taylor shares her story from the time her addiction started all the way to her journey to rehabilitation.

Sometimes, we have to swallow our pride and admit that we need others especially when things get really tough.

Take it easy, girl. You don’t have to face your demons alone all the time. It’s totally fine to get support from friends and family to get through this “transition” phase in your life.

On the other hand, not all changes are ugly.

They can be really cool, exciting, and a reason to have fun! Like this new spray-on nail polish! This can be your new best friend especially if you’re always on-the-go. So, check this out and take nail art to even wilder extremes.

I am so grateful to have met Kerry that day. It made me open my mind to the reality that in life there will always be difficult days, but as long as we remain patient and proactive, then there’s no reason to be afraid of the journey that lies ahead.

  • Astrid26

    Learning that life is unexpected and things don’t always go as planned was very hard for me to grasp when I was younger. Now that I am a little older and have had more life experiences I embrace change with opened arms. I think the older we get the more we learn to ease up on ourselves.

  • Jenna

    Oh tell me about it! I used to be like you as well. I guess “wisdom” comes with age and life experiences. And now that I am more relaxed about things in general, I don’t get stressed out as often as I used to.

  • beckahboo

    I am a living breathing example that life is unpredictable, but you can use major unexpected life changes as a way to grow and build character. Things won’t always go your way, but if you are open to what you can learn from the experience, and you try to find the positive in any situation, you can come out on top in all ways.

  • Kira

    Expectations vs. reality can be quite an eye opener. What you expect from marriage is “happily ever after.” What you get is learning to live with someone who leaves the toilet seat up. Patience and communication are the key. I have found that most of my downfalls have come from the lack of communication and expressing what my expectations are. It’s all a huge learning experience and I’m doing a lot better.

  • Marshia

    Not to add to your content, but it is also about being able to share your world with someone else. Admit when you are wrong and be able to live the way someone else needs you to live. Realize that it’s not all about you.

  • Georgine77

    I would like to say that I’m in the same boat. I’m not! I try to not stress the little things but I still do. I try to embrace change but I’m not quite there yet.

  • Georgine77

    What a great way to think about life. I love it and I hope to be able to think this way soon. I’m working on making myself a more rounded person.

  • Krissi5M3

    This is very nicely written. Expectations versus reality. My mom once told me that marriage is hard. You have to work at it if you want to keep it. I couldn’t agree more.

  • EmilyM

    Yes, yes, yes! Expectations vs. reality is probably one of the main reasons that marriages fail. How many women marry a man to change him? How many of those women then have children thinking it will make the marriage better? Thinking that a ring on your finger will somehow turn your mate into Prince Charming is all wrong! It’s hard work, but worth it, especially if you had that kind of relationship modeled to you by your parents. It won’t be a shock.

  • Chrissy35

    I couldn’t agree more. Fall in love with someone that you don’t want to change. You shouldn’t need to change the person that you are in love with. Add kids and it’s a whole mess.